goodbye to blueberry pie
an ode to a weird year
Floor Time
/flôr tīm/
noun
the 15-60 minute time period spent laying on the floor in the middle of the work day, typically as a relief from the soul-sucking reality of corporate America.
Believe it or not, there are only two weeks left of 2024. As I am A Sentimental Man1, I wanted to assemble a little lookback doc for this last Floor Time of the year. Afterall, a lot happened this year. I traveled to Asia, Mexico, Canada, and new states (namely, Maine). I ate incredible food, saw so many spectacular shows, and enrolled in new classes. I took significant career risks that made me gamble on myself in big ways—leading me to find my stride like never before.
My key learnings from the year aren’t profound nor—like florals for spring—groundbreaking, but I wanted to share them with you. Maybe you’ve stumbled on similar insights as well.
Key Learning #1: Look at the slow seasons as opportunities for growth
One thing about me is I’m a recovering girlboss. Early Corporate Clarice could’ve given Sophia Amoroso a run for her money because she was so high strung, manic, constantly worried about failure, and on edge about delivering perfect work. This year, I made some significant career changes that left me quite unemployed in the summer. In all four years of working for myself, it was the slowest it has ever been. And even though a lot of people lamented the slow job market, it didn’t stop my intrusive thoughts: Am I no longer hireable? Did I fumble my lead gen? Am I not good enough?
Finally, I summoned the courage to push myself in other directions. I enrolled in a brand identity / graphic design course at the Pratt Institute that reinvigorated my love of the work and helped rebuild my confidence as a competent professional. I used those newfound branding skills to revamp my entire website (even learning a little coding in the process). I did new client outreach. I essentially hit reset on my business. And I feel super locked in to the work I’m doing now, and I’m excited again about being self-employed. All that to say, sometimes the seasons of life can change quicker than you expect. And for someone like me who ~*loves control*~ it’s really hard to trust the process and believe that the right pieces will fall into place. But that’s actually just how life happens.
Key Learning #2: Gather and celebrate alllll the life milestones
I went to a record number (for me) of weddings this year. Two friends are currently pregnant. Growing up means seeing other people hit classic life milestones. But frankly, that’s not where I’m at, and there’s nothing wrong with that except I want big celebrations, too (and I always have—brings me back to this Floor Time from March 2022). This year, I went all out for my 30th birthday party. Friends flew in from California. My sister came from London. We rented out a private space that is often used for wedding receptions.2 I feel like the fanfare we organized gave the phenomenon of aging the celebratory weight it deserves.
I also celebrated 5 years of living in New York. A small group of friends and I went to a Chinese dinner, close to my first apartment, and shared a beautiful dinner. I printed photos of me with each friend and on the back, wrote a note telling them how they’ve helped shape and mold me into the New Yorker that I am. We also went around the table and shared our “moment you knew you were a New Yorker” stories. It was special, lovely, and again, gave the milestone the honor it deserves.
Key Learning #3: We’re adults at the same time as other more adult-y adults
Sometimes I still feel like a child even though I’m a fully functioning adult (allegedly). And I get confused when more adult-y adults act in ways I don’t understand, as they’re meant to be so much older and wiser. My therapist was the one who pointed out the obvious: We’re all doing adulthood for the first time. We’re navigating the ups and downs of life and figuring it all out as we go along. So sometimes, the people we looked to as kids no longer have the answers we now need as adults. That leaves us with the realities that a) older doesn’t always mean wiser, b) having grace is essential even when it doesn’t feel fair, and c) sometimes the answer isn’t clear and we’ll be forced to look inward rather than outward.
If you care, my other major learnings of the year
Make yourself uncomfortable by dissecting the “me problems”
Take immunity pills / probiotics / wellness vitamins cause we’re not 22 anymore
If you’re able, schedule warm trips during cold times
Cliché, but you’re never too old to learn something new (coming from someone who only at 30 finally snowboarded down a mountain without falling)
Disneyland really is the happiest place on earth
Nature is always the remedy
Something I Thought of in the Shower
Why does this new Native shampoo smell exactly like the scent my first grade teacher, Mrs. McCormick, used to wear?
Something To Laugh About
Here are this week’s gems:
This video made my entire body relax. The world is so beautiful and sometimes humans do beautiful things in it.
This little seal dog made me squeal. And I was today years old when I learned that dwarfism exists in dogs?
Wait. Is this man right?
Finally this, putting some respect on my man Bernard’s name.
Something for Clarice
Hey! This newsletter is free and I intend to keep it that way. That said, if you love it and want to show your appreciation, buy me a coffee :)
Something Pretty
This article is so funny to me because I feel like it’s so not revolutionary (and calling splitting the G an “online trend” is giving the same vibes as this incredible skit). But maybe I’m just a Guinness snob. Anyway this is the best I’ve ever done. Ain’t she beautiful.
By the way…I’m reading this.
These couple weeks before the Christmas break have been insane so I’ve actually barely made a dent. But the writing is so bad I am truly just reading for the plot.
And I’m watching this.
Funny enough tonight is Wicked round 3 for me…and also! I’m in season 2 of Arcane. This show is so, so good. And I can’t explain it but my favorite character is currently Heimerdinger. No spoilers pls.
Welp, that’s it for Floor Time this year. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for tuning in each week to read my generally pointless musings. I’ve been writing this newsletter for almost 3 years and it’s one of my favorite things to do. If you like it, please tell a friend! Happy holidays and see you in 2025.
‘Til next time, adult-y adults. Your friend,
Clarice
1 of 2 skips in the Wicked score and that’s that on that.
An aside, if you expect friends to show up and shell out for your “classic” milestones (e.g. your wedding, bachelor party, baby shower), then you should be willing to do the same for their birthday, or dog’s gotcha day party, or whatever-is-the-thing-they-want-to-celebrate party.