make weddings camp again
Floor Time
/flôr tīm/
noun
the 15-60 minute time period spent laying on the floor in the middle of the work day, typically as a relief from the soul-sucking reality of corporate America.
Well ya’ll, it happened. I finally realized—nay, accepted—that I am entering a new age! That age is formally referred to as the-age-where-everyone-you’ve-ever-known-including-people-you-don’t-really-know-are-getting-fiánced1-so-your-whole-future-travel-schedule-has-morphed-into-the-wedding-circuit. Maybe you are also that age, in which case, hi and where did you get that cute midi-length dress?
This past weekend I headed up to Vermont with my boyfriend and friend to attend one of their grad school friends’ wedding celebration. When asked if I wanted to spend Halloween weekend at a wedding for people I don’t know, I gave an enthused, “Vermont?! In fall?! During peak foliage szn?! Did Christmas come early?!” aka I said yes, def, pls. The weekend agenda was to include a group stay in a cabin and 3 days of wedding activities including a welcome dinner, the reception, and a goodbye brunch. We made the 6-hour journey on Thursday and returned late Sunday night.
If you’ve ever attended a wedding where you don’t know anyone aside from the person who plus-oned you and the bride/groom/fiancé—then you know that entering the space is not unlike arriving at summer camp in 2006 and not knowing a single soul. You put on your friend-making hat, roll through your get-to-know-you questions, and hope that you find someone cool to talk to. Spoiler: you basically always do.
This isn’t the first time I’ve gone to a wedding where I know very few people. Last year one of my closest friends from my study abroad program got married in Cape Cod. I knew this would mean journeying to a whole other state via long roadtrip to spend a weekend in a (stunning) resort with her close-knit group of college besties. So yeah, I was nervous. No matter how outgoing and friendly I can be, I still suffer from social anxiety (I know very few people who wouldn’t feel this way in a similar situation…do you??).
But you make it work. And for the Vermont weekend the boy had to work Friday, so I joined a group of 8 people I’d known for 10 minutes to go on a beautiful and scenic bike ride around the lake. I got to take in the fresh New England fall air and actually get to know the other wedding attendees separate from my plus-one. We spent the rest of the afternoon hanging by the lake and at the cabin drinking Treehouse beers and catching up (or in my case, making new friends).
I guess I’m telling you this for two reasons. First, if you’re getting married somewhere that is hard to get to and you make it like summer camp, automatically you’re curating a childlike vibe that is fun and youthful and memorable2. Second, I am a firm believer that there are parts of us that we don’t grow out of. Namely, the nervousness but consequent giddiness for connecting with a new person3. Knowing we all feel this way yet still having the courage to walk into a space—whether it be a work event, a wedding, or summer camp—and building connections with others is one of the most human experiences I can think of.4
Something I Thought of in the Shower
🎶 Who’s that wonderful girl? Could she be any cuter?🎶
(and also Eli sending me this…)
Something Pretty
Vermont in the fall 🥹
Something To Laugh About
Great gems for you this week:
How are we all the same person? Has anyone written a scholarly thesis about this? I need answers!! Why are these are only choices?!
This is yet another reminder that we’re all the same person.
Oop this me.
OK I GET IT THIS IS ALSO ME SORRY TO EVERYONE I HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH.
This is for my fellow Brooklynites. G-sus take the wheel.
I’ve been humbled so much lately with this. Aging is fun, kids!
Shoutout to my besties who also converse like this #girlhood.
Something for Clarice
Hey! This newsletter is free and I intend to keep it that way. That said, if you love it and want to show your appreciation, buy me a coffee :)
By the way…I’m reading this.
Next week I’m going to an Ali Hazelwood book event for her latest YA novel! I have already read it but catch me out here having a reread before Tuesday.
Have a lovely weekend enjoying this brisk fall air, my friends!
Til’ next time, plus-ones. Your friend,
Clarice
I am pretty sure this is one of those Clo-isms where I make up a word (a la “frindle”) but I love this term as a verb and I will be employing it now and into the future.
Not to say if you don’t do this are you lame, decrepit, and forgettable—please don’t read into this.
Soon to be BFFL?? Eh? Eh???
In case this whole thing sounds self-serving AF like “oo look at me I’m Clarice, I’m so social and good at making friends at weddings,” THIS ISN’T THE POINT I’M TRYING TO MAKE. I simply relate to how scary these situations are and applaud anyone who is trying to fit in a space that naturally makes them uncomfortable. That is so brave and awesome of you to do.